


Dear Mr. Taako,

by Raylir



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Gen, Letters, Minor Kravitz/Taako (The Adventure Zone), Pre-Epilogue, also actual Epilogue, taako is a dad in heavy denial
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-20
Updated: 2018-08-23
Packaged: 2018-12-17 16:21:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11855286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raylir/pseuds/Raylir
Summary: There's this thing called the postal service and Taako should've heard of it by now.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic/piece of writing longer that 2 pages please be gentle

Taako knows he has some rich snobs in his fanbase, it's not like the voidfish filters socioeconomic situations when it broadcasts information. The Taako brand is good and this definitely isn't the first time he gets a letter with a wax seal that most elves couldn't hope to beat in notoriety.

The seal was simple, but elegant. The central symbol was two catenary arches side by side, shining gold with the unique wax the sender had used, which color was as iconic as the insignia itself.

He's seen this once, on a chain around a very clever young boy's neck.

The letter opener is awkward in his hands as he fumbles open the envelope. He hasn't really had to read much mail himself since he hired people to sort through the mountains of dead trees that get sent to him on the reg, but he did list this boy's possible letters as "for Taako's eyes only". Biting his lip, he glances at the seal again, he wonders if Angus knows the varying meanings it holds across the planar systems. He snuffs the candles next to him as he shakes the letter free, just as pristine as he expected in the black and white filters of his darkvision.

 

 

 

 

> **_Dear Mr. Taako,_ **
> 
>  
> 
> **_Hello, sir! I hope you are doing well. You seem real busy with your new lifestyle brand, but I'm very happy with all the success surrounding it! I don't know if you've heard, but Mr Miller is planning to open a school so that all his family's knowledge can be spread throughout the world! It's opening next month and I'm planning to enroll myself. I'm so excited to go to school! It makes me wonder-- what was the IPRE like, sir, when you were studying there? Did you study as a wizard specializing in Transmutation or were course structures for wizards different in the Institution, or even the first world you lived in? There's so much more the day of story of song didn't reveal, sir!_ **
> 
> **_So many questions but so little paper!_ **
> 
> **_I'm also writing to you as a heads up--because of the course load I plan to take there's an optional recommendation letter for when I apply to the Academy. You don't need to do it, but you're the only magic teacher I could put down so  you might receive a letter for a review about my academic attitude and character. I'm not even sure it'll get through the letter checkers I've heard you had! I hope mine goes through._ **
> 
> **_I'm very thankful, for all that you've taught me and have done for me. Thank you! I don't know where I-- or anyone in the world-- would be if it wasn't for you._ **
> 
> **_I love you!_ **
> 
>  
> 
> **_Your favourite boy detective,_ **
> 
> **_Angus McDonald_ **
> 
> **_P.S. A lot of folks requested to be put as my "guardian" in my application form because Mr. Miller forgot to put "legal" in front of it. The others insisted that you wouldn't want to miss out on tormenting Mr. Miller, so I put your name down, too. Hopefully they're right?_ **
> 
> **_P.P.S. I've almost gotten the hang of piononos! I'll send some next time._ **

 

There are no lights in the room that can show what he starts scratching on a fresh piece of parchment ( _Dear ~~Agnus Ango~~ Agnes_) but by the time the sun rises it's a half-completed draft that's shoved in his work desk's bottom drawer, the only spot not infested with knick knacks from his hoarding ways. He completes it the next night, stuffs it in the same drawer with the envelope and doesn't take it anywhere near the post office.

Angus knows better than to expect a reply from him. The chef can't even begin to understand having someone to write… “home” to.

 

Another different letter, however, reaches the Academy of Arcane Sciences.

 

* * *

 

Angus still sends another one after that. And another. And another.

 

Taako still gets night terrors after everything, again. And again. And again.

 

He still wakes up tossing and turning in the middle of the night, but now he’s got his darkvision and some ink. So when he can’t get out of where his mind tries to trap him he takes those letters out and pens replies, half a dozen versions to the same letter as he eats whatever pastry Angus decides to make that month. Taako's using two drawers now, for the letters he gets and the ones he doesn't send.

 

* * *

 

It's another school's establishment he's responsible for when the letters are brought up. It a night of celebration, prompting some wine and video games with **robust** character creation. Taako’s blasted the fantasy PS4 controller (an inside joke with Kravitz) so he's waiting for him now-- the reaper’s taken to confiscating controllers from necromancers for this specific purpose.

"Where are you keeping them now?" he shouts from Taako's room.

"The lower drawers, hon!" he answers, leaning over the arm of the couch as if being a foot or two closer would help in being heard.

Taako pours both of them another glass of wine as he watches the character on the screen's idle animation for a few minutes. A particularly wild hair style they've gots to try catches his eye and he chokes.

"BABE! YOU'VE _GOT_ TO SEE THIS!"

Silence. Then, the gentle thumping of bare feet on the floor gets louder and faster, and Taako is greeted with his beaming boyfriend making quick work of plugging in a new controller and squeezing back in next to him.

" **Holy shit** , Taako, are you seeing--"

" _The hair gravity forgot_?!"

The dark-haired dork has already selected said hairstyle, spinning the character rapidly and making face parts in wrong face places clip through each other in what H.P. Lovecraft probably described as indescribable. Kravitz pulls out his work voice but it’s so so much **worse**. Taako's losing it at this point, wine-drunk and so happy he gets to have this moment. He glances over at the man who’s tangled their legs together as his hollering subsides to giggles.

"Oh gosh... hey, what took you so long in there? Thought one of my drawers _ate_ you or something."

"You have **a lot** of drawers, Taako, so I actually wouldn’t be surprised if one of them did that? It took me a minute to find the right one and uhm..." he smiles in a way that's the slightest bit strained, is that guilt? "I found the letters? For Angus? I didn't mean to snoop I swear! It's just--"

"No need to explain, my dude. I was considering replying to Ango once but I kinda decided that that's not too important. Gotta spend time improving the business right now."

"Is **that** why there's another letter you're writing on your desk?"

Taako doesn't know how to reply to that, so he drains his wine glass, hoping it covers up how much redder he gets.

 

 

* * *

 

“Hello, sir! Did you get my letters?”

 

“Of course I did, Ango, I _opened_ all of them and _read_ them.”

 

_He’s sliding the letter opener with ease now, practiced and perfected as he places it back in the mess he calls his work desk._

 

“Why did you say that that weird?”

 

“Nothing! I just, read them! _All_ the words.

 

_He’s realising there are terms he’s forgotten with his sister that give him a burning sensation right behind his eyes as small but significant pieces of his memory hurtle at him at break neck speed. He gets lost in remembering learning magic with her when Angus writes about lessons. He’s so happy his boy gets to share his education with good friends._

 

Pictures? Were there pictu-

 

_He’s scratching out the outline of his new hat at the bottom of his letter, mimicking the boy detective’s doodle of his new glasses._

 

No, just the words, I can tell from your face It’s just words no pictures.

 

_He’s considering asking for one. Even just to gouge how tall this boy is probably getting. Humans grow up so so fast and he crosses out the words “slow down or you’ll get old in a day" because the thought makes him... unsettled._

 

So yes I read all of the letters.”

 

 

 

 

> **_I'm going to try out for the soccer team soon, sir! I'm a bit nervous, but I've been practicing a lot so I think I can get in!_ **

 

He would’ve said:

>   _Good luck, little man! Your scrawny boy legs are probably going to need it._

He would’ve said:

>   _Nice choice of sport, Ango. I never tried it myself, but me and Lup crushed it at varsity volleyball._

He would’ve said:

>   _Finally I can claim the middle-class suburban mom aesthetic. Any other youth sporting events you wanna join in?_

 

  

 

> **_Working on research is very very tiring sir, but it's still so fun to learn about magic circles! I didn't know that you could just omit so much of it and still have it work._ **

 

He would’ve said:

> _Never was attached to drawing with chalk on the floor. Like, good for other wizards I guess but I would rather not get beheaded as I leaned down in preparation for hopscotch or whatever it does._

He would’ve said:

> _I’m glad the Academy is keeping that big brain of yours busy. Also, if you’re looking for any advice on magic circles I’ve got squat, my man. They’re inconvenient and impractical. 0/10_

He would’ve said:

> _It’s kind of nice that you’re learning things I never would have taught you (Still,I did not teach you magic circles for a good reason though, Agnes.)_

 

 

 

> **_I'm having a lot of fun being here sir, but sometimes I miss your very direct teaching._ **

 

He would’ve said:

> _I do have a school y’know?_

He would’ve said:

>    _I’d normally suggest Taako’s Amazing School of Magic but it doesn't have the focus on technology you seem to favor, Ango. Though if you miss my teaching you'd probably like the duels._

He would’ve said:

>    _I miss your many many questions during your time as my student too. Maybe if you had asked them I could’ve corrected the texture of these cinnamon rolls you’ve sent._

 

 

 

 

> **_I love you!_ **

 

He would’ve said:

>   _I love me too, little man._

He would’ve said:

> _You’re a dork, Ango._

He would’ve said:

 

> _I'm so so proud of you, pumpkin._
> 
>   
> 
> _I love you, too._


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! it's been a bit over a year since I published this but I've decided to move towards a resolution of sorts

“It’s ok, Angus. It’s my fault for asking you to demonstrate in the house.” Lup said gently. He felt her helping him up from the floor all the way up to his feet. “I’m sure my brother won’t mind.”   
  
“You really think so?” he sniffled, peeking out from under his hands. He was being guided upstairs, following the trail of the fox that bolted towards Taako’s room.

 

“ _ Well, _ probably not, but what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him. Come on. We’ll just-- oh Raven Queen herself how’d your familiar learn how to lock doors.” As the boy gives a noise of distress, Lup’s face unscrunched itself from her expression of distaste. “It’s fine! I think it’s amazing that you could train it to be so smart since you’re like, what, 9?”

 

“Age doesn’t determine skill, and-- and I’m 11 and a half, ma’am.” Angus plants a hand on his hip and cocks his head to the side. “That being said, I didn’t tell it how to do that. It’s just supposed to help me investigate things by getting to places too small for my flesh boy body.”  

 

“Oof. That’s an unfortunate way of wording it. I’ll just cast--” Angus waves his hands in a gesture of distress as Lup reaches for her repaired umbrella.

  
“Oh there’s no need to expend another spell slot, ma’am. I have proficiency with lock picking kits!” 

 

Lup steps to the side as the boy detective sticks his tongue out in concentration and fumbles with the lock. It takes a bit, but a victorious click eventually resounds through the hallway. “After you!” he says with pride.

 

The room was in utter chaos. A haphazard entanglement of sheets was knotted up on the mattress, shoved next to the only window in the room. It’s still had books, mugs, and various knick knacks useful for what seems to be fishing. A clutter of pens spilled on the floor of what he assumes to be Taako’s work desk. A desk which had several other mugs either upright or on their side, half of which bear Taakos name and a quarter of which had his face. Under most of the mugs were unaligned stacks of paper that seemed to nearly topple over, not to mention the stacks that seemed to have done so already. Picking one a paper from the floor under a discarded sweater, Angus reads crossed out names for various products--most likely for the lifestyle brand. 

 

“Better put that back now, Taakos going to see something’s off.”

 

“But, ma’am--”

 

“Trust me, Angus, there’s a simple 4 step process on how to never have to confront Taako about this. You just have to go find what your fox friend went and curled up in, fix up what it moved, touch nothing else, and then we can forget this ever happened. Now concentrate, where do you feel it?”

 

Find his fox friend. Fix up what it moved. Touch nothing else. Forget this ever happened. Angus screws his eyes so tight he sees a red tint shining through his eyelids. Beyond that, he sees an ocean of blue static and islands bordered with bright multicolored light swimming in his vision. He tries hard, really hard. He can feel his gut flip from the thought of Taako getting mad at him, for moving his stuff and letting an animal loose in his room. The pick up of his heart rate causes his concentration to waver and sweat to bead on his forehead. Oh god can’t he just cast detect magic? No the room would light up like a Candlenights tree. Dismiss him? That’s even worse, they’ll never find what’s off. Ok. Ok, concentrate. 

 

_ Find his fox friend. _ It’s a small space, quite dark but this only heightens the the textures of papers brushing past his limbs.

 

_ Find his fox friend. _ A leg twitches, a sound of something knocking on the wood is heard from the desk.

 

_ Find his fox friend.  _ Another movement, this time a shift in weight that pushes the drawer slightly ajar.

 

“Great work, kiddo!” Lup smiles down at him, proud.

 

_ Fix up what it moved.  _ He moves closer to the desk, cracking an eye open and reaching for the handle.

 

_ Fix up what it moved.  _ He dismisses it safely, and takes a wild guess as to how these stacks of paper were supposed to look like.

 

_ Fix up what it moved. _ He takes them out to stack them, leaving behind envelopes presumably ripped open to free the letters. The glint of gold wax catches his eye.

 

“Lulu! Can you open the door for me?” Comes muffled from downstairs.

 

“Hold your horses, Taako! I’ll be down in a minute!-- Angus just hurry up with the fixing I’ll stall as much as I can.” Lup finishes talking halfway out the bedroom door, throwing a quick thumbs up before disappearing below the stairs.

 

_ Touch nothing else. _ Angus has had to distinguish between many insignias in his line of work, and he doesn’t need to see the body of the letter to see that it’s definitely his. 

 

_ Touch nothing else.  _ He looks up-- a letter opener is shoved at the right-hand side of the table.

He shoves the letters back in and reaches for the drawer directly below it, he does not see his own handwriting on these.

 

_ Touch nothing else. _ He can’t bear to look at them. He can’t bear to put them down. He compromises by shoving them in his messenger bag and turning away from the desk, away from the bedroom and the stairs, and towards thoughts of his former teacher, Taako.

 

“What’s up, Agnes?” The man himself pulls the boy out of his thoughts as his feet rest on the last step. He had a sparkling get up and smudged makeup that probably looked neater this morning. The tiredness in his eyes made it look as if the camera flashes had stolen their light. “You look like you just heard my “peed your loincloth” monologue again.”

 

_ Forget this ever happened.  _ “It’s nothing I’ll be--I’ll be fine.”

 

_ Forget this ever happened.  _ “Hmph, if you say so.”

 

_ Forget this ever happened. _

**Author's Note:**

> Angus's family insignia is just straight up a McDonald's logo by the way


End file.
